Zen Mother Knows Best

The author, one-day old, in mother's arms

At the opening of Tiger Woods Learning Center in 2006, Bill Clinton commented that in the background of every great man is a boy who was terrified of his mother.

Well, may be "terrified" is too terrifying a word to describe the special and complex relationship between a great man and his mom, but I guess we all understand what the former president wanted to convey. Behind every great man, there is a mother who is very strict in disciplining her child. When they grow up and become successful, however, those men give all the credit to no one else but their disciplining mother. His Majesty the King and Gandhi are two such examples.

Today's article is an attempt to celebrate such mothers who have risked terrifying their children to make sure that their lot would grow up to become a hard-working person with integrity who dedicates one's life to serve others.

Admittedly, at first the author would like to keep this article for next year's Mother's Day. But life is so full of uncertainty, as the Law of Impermanence would remind us. There is nothing that guarantees that we would still be here tomorrow, let alone next Mother's Day. Therefore, let us pay tribute to our mothers as soon and as often as we can. Having said that, mom, this week's article is for you!

The woman behind Ikkyu's Enlightenment

Anybody who has been around since 1975 must have been more or less familiar with the cartoon series, Ikkyu-San. The series, based on a true story, enjoyed a tremendous success. A lot has been discussed about Ikkyu the young novice who went on to achieve Enlightenment, but very little has been said about his mother except how much the little Ikkyu was attached to her and how much influence she had on him.

Ikkyu was born in 1394 to Emperor Go-Komatsu and Iyono Tsubone, a court noble who was a descendant of the aristocratic Fujiwara clan. However, both mother and child were forced to leave the court to the countryside where Ikkyu went to stay at a local Zen temple at the tender age of five to begin his study. His mother also took up Zen practice seriously.

We would have no idea how dedicated and successful Lady Tsubone was in her Zen training if we had not found the following piece of writing. It was her last testament to Ikkyu in the form of a letter. To the uninitiated, the letter may sound like what is popular known today as "tough love." In fact, those people are right. Zen "love" is almost always tough love, as exemplified in an apparently stern relationship between the Zen master and his/her disciples. The letter reads:

"... To Ikkyu:

I have finished my work in this life and am now returning into Eternity. I wish you to become a good student and to realize your Buddha-nature. You will know if I am in hell or whether I am always with you or not.

If you become a man who realizes that the Buddha and his follower Bodhidharma are your own servants, you may leave off studying and work for humanity. The Buddha preached for 49 years and in all that time found it not necessary to speak one word. You ought to know why. But if you don't and yet wish to, avoid thinking fruitlessly.

Your Mother,

Not born, not dead

First day of the 9th month

P.S. The teaching of Buddha was mainly for the purpose of enlightening others. If you are dependent on any of its methods, you are naught but an ignorant insect. There are 80,000 books on Buddhism and if you should read all of them and still not see your own nature, you will not understand even this letter. This is my will and testament..."

(Source: http://www.ashidakim.com)

Understanding Ikkyu's mother's last words

Even with absolutely no prior Zen training at all, one is already moved by the way a mother took the trouble to leave her caring, final words to her young son in order to make sure he grows up to be a decent man, achieve Enlightenment and serve others.

If, like the author, the readers also identify with Ikkyu as someone who was first introduced to Buddhist mindfulness practice by one's own mother since childhood, this letter would certainly take on a much deeper meaning.

Recognized for its profound Zen message, the letter was included in a Zen Koan collection. A Koan is a question, dialogue, or statement generally containing aspects that seems to be beyond rationality yet could be understood via intuition derived from Buddhist mental development.

Let us attempt to understand the meaning behind Lady Tsubone's last words together in a Zen-style question and answer.

What does "returning to Eternity" means?

It is the return to "nothingness," that is, to return to nature, to be one with nature. Being one with nature means there is no "self" which indicates the state of Enlightenment.

Why comparing Lord Buddha to servants?

The sentence likely refers to the stage when one practices Zen/mindfulness enough to realize that all human beings are but the same continuing process of nama and rupa interaction, with nama being the psychological elements and rupa being the physical elements. Lord Buddha once said that the level of metta, loving-kindness, he had towards his son Rahul and his arch enemy Devadatta are the same, meaning Lord Buddha saw both as beings that equally strive to be free from suffering.

Why saying Lord Buddha found it not necessary to speak one word?

Zen teaching believes that a dhamma transmission does not have to be verbal. Zen usually refers to the story of Lord Buddha lifting up one flower without saying a word (as a way to teach dhamma). Phra Maha Kassapa, considered the first Zen Patriarch, was the only one who understood as he smiled to that gesture. With that, the first Zen transmission was complete.

Why one should avoid "thinking fruitlessly"?

Thinking is one of the five enemies that prevent one to attain the continuous concentration required to develop the highest level of wisdom in Buddhism, Bhavanamayapanna.

What is "not born, not dead"?

According to Bodhidharma, the Indian monk who went to China and made Zen popular, this indicates the state of Nirvana.

What does "dependent on its methods" mean?

Zen strips all practice methods as prescribed in the scripture to its core, zeroing in only on the state of being totally aware in the present moment.

Historical records did not indicate whether Ikkyu was actually "terrified" by his mother's last words, but history did record how successful Ikkyu later became in life. By not wanting to disappoint his strict mother (who, in her dying breath, sounded absolutely Zen-like in her wish for her son's spiritual development), Ikkyu went on to impose an even stricter discipline on his own Zen practice.

While some people considered Ikkyu to be an eccentric monk towards the later part of his life, nobody disputed his satori, Enlightenment. He left quite a legacy, both in a written form and otherwise.

The ever-impermanent world calls for immediate action. Consequently, do not make your mother wait until her last moments before she could be assured that you will be doing fine because you have finally become spiritually mature. There is nothing a mother wants more than knowing that her child will be taken care of properly after she was gone. Get immediate mindfulness training in a retreat now before it is too late. Think of it as the most valuable gift you can give to your mother. It is special because only you can give it to her. No one else could.

P.S. I love you, mom!

The Awakening Ballad

Rain of Roof II originally uploaded by Jeff Epp

The rainy season has arrived here in earnest. And what could be more delightful than listening to the sound of tiny raindrops drizzling gently onto different surfaces? This time, there is an added incentive - mini-enlightenment!

As a result of contemporary, urbanised lifestyle, it is regrettable that many of us regard rain as a nuisance, an unwelcome guest arriving at the most inconvenient hours.

The truth is, life unfolds the way we choose to live it. The very same rain ballad can mean a inspiration and refreshing tonic to some, a frustration and let-down to others.

How would you choose to look at it?

The Japanese have a monumental gallery of words for rain-related expressions, not to mention countless nature-imitating sounds to describe the different sounds of the rain and raindrops. Potsu-potsu, shito-shito, poro-poro and (quite similar to Thai) su, tsu, sa, saa, and zaa are but a few.

The pleasure goes beyond nature-imitating sounds. The expression "spring rain (rain in one fine spring day)," for example, carries with it a romantic connotation to Japanese ears. One could almost visualise a scene from a lovey-dovey music video. Thai expressions for rain are probably less romantic, given the fact that we live in the monsoon-ridden tropics. "Rain to shoo away the elephants (fon lai chang)," anyone?

The underlying implication is that the ancient Japanese must have been extraordinarily mindful to be able to differentiate the sounds of rain. At present, paying attention to the different sounds of raindrops has a scientific twist. Scientists now believe that "white noise" has therapeutic benefits for ADHD sufferers and/or those who suffer from insomnia. Commercially-produced white noise CDs usually feature, among others, different sounds of rain and raindrops.

In fact, even without science, our intuition already told us that this must have been the case. Who does not remember lying down in bed during childhood listening to the sound of gentle raindrops on the roof and feel at peace with oneself before drifting off happily?"

Children are among those fortunate few that can listen attentively, non-judgmentally - an important element of mindfulness practice. In Buddhism, there are many teachings relating to the benefits of mindful listening. "Those who listen well will acquire wisdom," is one. Another teaching points out that, to be a valued friend, one should possess the ability to listen objectively without letting emotions or bias take over.

Zen Buddhism gives us plenty of real-life examples of the importance of mindful listening. The Rinzai sect, for example, favours the use of koan - a type of question to trigger the listener's Enlightenment. Those questions usually sound beyond rationality yet making perfect sense to those who have meditated enough.

Want to try one? How about, "What is the sound of one hand clapping?" Ok, now meditate hard on it. After all, this is a real koan from the 17th century that actually enlightened someone!

Is this real? Had anyone, beside those in Lord Buddha's time, actually got Enlightened by an aural trigger, verbal or otherwise?

The answer is yes. Among others, Ikkyu the Zen monk got Enlightened by the sound of a crow one early morning while meditating on a boat on Lake Biwa.

Yes, humans can achieve Enlightenment from a sound from nature. Whether 15th century Japan or 21st century Thailand. Nature remains nature and so do humans. Our sensorial perception does not change with time. Let us make full use of it!

If you feel the idea of Enlightenment is so far-flung for a layperson, you are not the only one. But don't feel disheartened just yet. The truth is, there are many levels of Enlightenment we can aim for, at least in the beginning. The Japanese have a word for it: kizuku, "awareness". It is known among Zen practitioners since the old days as "small enlightenment." In the simplest sense, kizuku is one's ability to be aware of what goes on with our body and mind. It is when someone becomes mindful naturally.

Which brings us right back to the middle of the rainy season here in Thailand. Why don't we turn our perceived crisis of endless downpours at the most inconvenient hours into an awakening opportunity? Next time, when you are stuck somewhere, either in very, very bad traffic, in shade upcountry, or in a golf course's clubhouse waiting for the rain to stop, try opening your ears, and thus your mind, to welcome each droplet with peace. Practice mindful listening. Simply listen without evaluating, criticising or complaining.

The trick is to allow yourself to immerse in this simple activity for a continuous period of time. Do nothing else, just listen. Pay attention to how different the rain sounds when it falls on different surfaces. Listen to how hard, or how gentle, it is raining at that moment. Notice how each sound of the raindrop simply comes and goes. No sound lasts forever. Perk your ears to catch the changing pattern of the rain as it happens. You will be amazed how much you can learn from this simple, mindful listening experience. If there are any other sounds of nature rising during that period: thunder, birds chirping, a frog croaking, crickets singing, etc, note it, too.

The real learning is not going to be about the rain itself, but it is about you! The first thing you may become aware of is how restless your mind is! Streams of thoughts or feelings simply refuse to go away. Do not force them. Just be aware of those thoughts as they come, accept them (that this thing does happen), and let go. Then, go back to pay attention to the rain attentively. Be persistent. Don't give up.

Once you have mastered this exercise, you will notice a change in yourself, most notably when you have to engage in a conversation. You will realise that most of the time in the past, you were not really listening to what others want to say. You were listening to your own thoughts!

In other words, you are likely to talk to yourself or plan a reply (or retort) all the time while your partner is still talking! Mindful listening to the rain would not only let you know how to relax while listening to anything yet remain suitably focussed, but also how to listen without judgement.

This, in turn, would help you really understand your conversation partner's feeling and the key message he/she wants to convey. Sympathy and compassion will naturally follow. By listening to the rain mindfully, you will discover a natural way to cultivate positive mental quality in your heart. It is dhamma in its purest form - from nature, to nature.

Given this month's weather trend, it is probably raining now outside. It is your chance to get Enlightened! Don't wait, act now.

Until next week, let us stay mindful.